La douleur exquise
by Nocona
Summary: A/U; SQ There will be mentions of OQ, but nothing drastic. Regina is a ballet dancer, eager to please her mother and to win her dance partner's affections. An accident keeps her from achieving both. But there's the annoying blonde, who keeps pushing her buttons and makes her reach for the stars and her long buried dreams.
_Disclaimer: I don't own "Once upon a time" or any of the character. "Once upon a time" and its characters belongs to the creators of the show, ABC and some even to Walt Disney. Sadly none of them are mine, but I'll dare to borrow them for a while and promise to give them back unharmed._

 _This is a fan fiction, no copyright infringement is intended._

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 **Someone immensely dear to me gave me this prompt...once upon a time.**

 **I never got around to write it until recently, so I apologise for the delay.**

 **DA, this is for you. I hope it turns out the way you've imagined it, I'll give this story my very best.**

 **Thanks for this incredible prompt, this fabulous idea - it's everything and more. Almost as incredible as your own stories, which I love dearly. It's a pleasure to write for you again.**

 **It's been too long.**

 **3**

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 **LA DOULEUR EXQUISE**

 **Prolog**

 _by Nocona_

"Plié!"

Regina winced as she bent down, her left knee burning at the movement, but she never wavered.

"Up, down, up, down..." Cora Mills commanded and watched as her daughter struggled to keep up the pace. She pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to swallow the disappointment of Regina's poor performance, "What the hell are you doing?! Do you want to put the audience to sleep, Regina? The premiere is in four weeks and you have so much catching up to do. You aren't getting any younger either. This is probably your last chance and you know it, Regina. So could you possibly be bothered to try your hardest when I'm offering private training lessons or is that too much to ask?!"

Cora's words were not meant as a question, her icy tone left no doubt about it.

"No, mother. I'm sorry. I'll try harder", Regina answered with hanging shoulders. She felt defeated because her mother was right. Of course she was, she was always right.

There were not many more chances coming her way at the age of 32, but it really was not that she did not try her best – if only that excruciating pain in her knee would finally go away.

The sound of Cora's bamboo cane hitting the floor almost made Regina jump and she eyed her mother warily. She was well aware of the pain that cane could inflict on someone, she had the scars to prove it.

"Focus", Cora hissed impatiently, "And from the beginning...plié!"

Regina got back into position and bent her knees, swallowing as best as she could.

"Up, down, up, down, up, down..." Cora tapped the bamboo cane against the floor so Regina could keep the pace, but her daughter barely managed to do the "simple" task.

"Push harder, Regina. There is no time for dawdling, you've had enough of a break. If you want to dance that premiere you have to suffer through this."

A break. How dare her mother call her knee injury a break? An injury Cora herself had been responsible for when she had made her and her dance partner Robin doing figures and jumps they had not nearly been prepared for.

Regina felt the tears welling in her eyes, but she managed to swallow them down, knowing full well that it would only get worse if she would cry. Cora would give her hell.

She bent her knees once again, pushed harder to get back up into her normal stand like her mother undoubtedly expected, silently groaning as the pain in her knee intensified.

"Retiré."

Regina closed her eyes and prayed that her knee would not give out on her. She could not afford another fall, another injury – she had worked too hard to earn her first leading role.

She lifted her right leg up in the air and bent it expertly to bring it to touch her standing leg with her toes around the height of her hurting knee.

Her supporting leg trembled slightly, her knee not as stable as it should be, but thankfully strong enough to support her weight for the moment.

"Keep your neck straight, hands stretched", Cora ordered dryly, but Regina knew it would not get better than that and she followed that part of her mother's instructions easily.

"Arabesque."

A new sigh escaped Regina's lips. Of course Cora would not let her catch a break.

She raised her working leg into position, the angle of 90° degrees almost reached with complete ease, the leg parallel to the floor, the right arm parallel to the leg, the left one stretched about her head, pointing forward gracefully and hopefully not too tense.

If one would ask Regina she would say she was happy, bordering on ecstatic that she was able to pull of an arabesque á la hauteur shortly after her knee injury, aware that Cora would never be satisfied with an arabesque á demi hauteur. Everything under a 90° degree angle was a waste of her mother's time.

"Regina, what is this?! En pointe...now", Cora demanded disbelievingly and Regina's eyes went wide, sweat starting to form on her forehead, "But mother...my knee..." she pleaded.

Hell, she was glad that her left knee had not given out on her yet while she stood on her flat foot and even that in itself seemed like a miracle, but standing on her toes? No, it really was not a good idea.

"En pointe!" Cora's voice left no room for discussion and so Regina pushed her leg into the ground, testing its strength before she pushed more and managed to push herself up on her toes. The pain in her knee was nauseating, but Regina managed to keep her focus. This was not the time for failure.

"Sauté arabesque." Cora sounded bored and nowhere near happy, but neither did Regina.

"I can't do jumps yet, mother. Graham said..." Her psychical therapist had warned her not to do anything crazy like jumps so soon after her recovery, her knee would not be able to cushion it properly and that chances that she would end up with another injury if she tried would be way too high.

Cora scoffed, but composed herself quickly and snarled, "I don't care what Graham says...if I say jump, you jump!"

Regina moved back down to stand on her whole foot to relieve her knee at least a little, turning to face her mother, "And what if my knee gives out and I bust it again? It's too early. You might not like it, but it is...as you pointed out yourself it's only four weeks till the premiere. I can't risk another injury, mother. And you know it."

She held her breath and prayed that Cora would see reason for once. It was not like they would be able to find a replacement in a day or two if she were to injury her knee again and then there would not be a Snow White ballet without their Snow White.

"Three days. You have three more days...then you'll jump or you are out." Cora sounded so determined that Regina began to suspect that is was not an empty threat, no matter how lost they would be without her, "Yes, mother."

"Arabesque penché. En pointe."

Cora watched Regina in challenge, but the brunette dancer knew better than to speak up again.

She got up on her toes and leaned her body trunk forward to counterbalance her working leg, which almost rose vertical. She stretched her back and neck, staring straight ahead, right into her mother's hard eyes.

Her knee felt like jello and Regina was about to move her working leg back down, worried that her knee would give out on her after all when Cora started to circle her, mustering her from different angles and all of a sudden the bamboo cane hit her left calf, almost hitting her knee bent, causing Regina to scream out in pain.

"Stretch that leg properly! And stop swaying like a tree branch in the wind!"

Regina's muscles grew sore and she braced for the fall that would follow inevitably when a knock on the door distracted her mother long enough for her to get back on both feet, the pain in her knee almost overwhelming at this point.

The Rabbit Hole's make up artist, Ruby Lucas, entered the dance studio, giving Regina a concerned look before she cleared her throat and turned to face Cora Mills, "I apologize for the interruption, Misses Mills. Granny sent me to tell you that the costumes are ready. Also that Miss Blanchard and Mister Nolan are already at her office to try them on. Your presence is required to make sure they are to your satisfaction."

Cora nodded, "I'll be there in a minute."

Ruby knew she was dismissed so she left the dance studio in search for Graham. She might not be friends with Regina, simply because Cora's daughter was not friends with anyone at the theatre despite her being a regular at the ensemble for many years now, but Regina clearly was in pain and needed help. That much had been obvious.

Once the make up artist was gone Regina openly glared at her mother, "Costumes? Miss Blanchard?"

What was going on? And why was the aspiring Boston ballerina in Storybrooke? Where they preparing another production she did not know about?

Cora touched her chest, "Didn't I tell you? We were able to hire Mary Margaret Blanchard and that charming boyfriend of hers as Snow White and her prince."

Her mother's words felt like a slap in the face, no, more like a punch straight to the gut and Regina felt the bile rise in her throat, "But I...you promised ME the role of...Snow White. I literally tortured myself through rehab as fast as humanly possible because you promised me that I would get the lead...you promised me!"

Cora barked out a cruel laugh, "Regina, you disappoint me yet again. Did you really believe I would let you dance the lead. You never reached the level I expected from you. The theatre needs a star. Just look at you...you can't jump, right now you can't even pull of a proper arabesque. Hell, you can barely stand on that leg with your knee being so unstable...you are nowhere near a leading role. We are lucky that Miss Blanchard was willing to step in to save us the embarrassment of having to cancel the whole show. Her technique is exquisite, her work ethic is as well and together with Mister Nolan she will shine and bring us the publicity we need. If you work hard enough you can dance The Evil Queen. And that's already more than you deserve...and now excuse me. I have a costume fitting to attend to."

Without another look in her daughter's direction Cora Mills left the dance studio and Regina slid to the floor in defeat, burying her face in her hands while her first tears fell.

All those years of training, fighting and enduring, all her sacrifices – it meant nothing. It had all been in vain.


End file.
